Work in Progress

Once upon a time, there was a little semi-detached rowhouse in Washington, D.C. It was a happy little house that had been in the same family for nearly 70 years. Then, four years ago, a real estate agent and investor named Tom bought it. He, like hundreds of others in this town, was into flipping. Buy a house, semi-gut it, install neat new fixtures and floors, paint the outside a pretty color, double the price, and laugh all the way to the bank.

Today's story is about the outside of the house. It is about a tree, three bushes, and a driveway.

This is the tree. An old elm that is at least 40 years old, but maybe older...

These are the bushes. Arborvitae. Hate them. They're coming out...

This is the driveway. The mess on both sides is part of my project...

Tom decided the backyard needed a new driveway, so he hired a crew--because flippers rarely ever do the work themselves after the first three or four flips and this was Tom's 10th or 11th flip--who took out the old driveway and prepared to pour a new driveway. That's all well and good, but in order for the new driveway to be flat and even, they hacked at the roots of this old elm tree. As a result, the old elm tree is dying and will have to be cut down soon. In putting in the new driveway, Tom decided to leave a strip of dirt and weeds on the west side of the drive and a strip of weeds on the east side of the drive. Why, is a mystery. It isn't enough space to create an urban oasis, per se. And it's just enough space to be a pain-in-the-ass, as in it needs to be mowed.

Well, tired of this strip of nothingness and wanting to expand possible off-street parking, this new home owner decided to get rid of the dirt and pave it. But money was tight, so what to do? Lo, and hark! A call did come from Janet's friend and realtor, Monica, who said, "I have brick. Do you want brick?" and Janet said, "YES!"

So far, I've dug out 2/3 of the grass and weeds. I'll likely do the rest this weekend or early next week.
Note one set of pavers at the bottom of the stairs. I'm not sure where these will go yet, but I'll figure it out.
The strip of grass and weeds I'm digging out will be replaced by red brick I salvaged from a friend last year.

The plan in the back is to get the rest of the grass and weeds up. Note I'm about 2/3 finished. It's tough work. You should see the blisters I have (and no, I won't be providing pictures of those, thank.you.very.much!) Once I have the grass and weeds up, I'm going to till the ground to loosen the rest of the dirt, dig out the dirt about three inches, lay down some black nonwoven cloth that will prevent weeds, top that with some sand, and lay brick. Hopefully, when I'm done, I'll have a spot I can use to park a second car when needed and a place to put containers for small gardening.

The other project is the front. In a continuation of Tom's flipping wonders, he planted grass on the west side of the house--which gets very little sun in the summer--that has not been hardy enough to survive in the shade. Plus, he terraced it cheaply. I'm smoothing off the bad terracing with some of the dirt I dig out of the back and reseeding that. He also planted three arborvitaes in the front yard in front of the house. That's lovely for about five years, but then they grow rangy and huge and out of control and will obscure the front of the house and I hate arborvitaes. So, I'm digging them out next week and working the soil. I may or may not terrace it to build up the growing area, then I'll probably plant azaleas.

This is what it looks like in the spring after a little rain.
Notice that it's not looking all that healthy...

This is what it looks like right now after treating it with an herbicide to kill the weeds and bad grass.
I'll be treating this with a hardier grass seed and some Miracle-Gro...

So, there you have. My back-breaking, blister-producing, blood, sweat, and tears project. The moral of the story: don't cheap out on landscaping when you flip a house. Azaleas actually would have been cheaper than arborvitaes and are prettier. Planting a hardy grass that's good in all temperatures and sun conditions is a smart move. And, if you're going to destroy a tree to pour a driveway, pour it all the way across.

And that's just the outside. Don't even get me started on the cheap-ass, chicken-sh*t stuff he did on the inside.

Photos by D.C. Confidential